Handling Discrimination in the LGBTQ+ Community

There’s still work to do to ensure equality in the real estate industry

By Lisa A. Beach

Bias and discrimination of the LGBTQ+ community hit the real estate industry on multiple levels, impacting agents and homebuyers and sellers.

According to a 2022 report published by the LGBTQ+ Real Estate Alliance, unconscious bias and blatant discrimination persist in the real estate industry—despite Diversity, Equity and Inclusion (DEI) efforts and increased marketing towards the LGBTQ+ community.

To gain perspective and to understand what’s happening in the field, members share their experiences and how they choose to handle these situations.

On the agent side

Just ask Gianetta Wilson, a real estate consultant and licensed agent with Keller Williams Realty in Savannah, Georgia, and St. Petersburg/Tampa, Florida. Wilson, who is actively earning her CRS Designation, was talking once with a set of sellers and they turned her away after the conversation shifted to family dynamics.

Wilson’s strategy to win customers focuses on talking about the market, which establishes her as the local expert. But she also tries to make that personal connection, sometimes asking sellers if they have kids. “As soon as I started talking about my family, I could feel the energy shift,” says Wilson, who identifies as gay. “I’m very open about who I am,” she says. “When I brought up the fact that I have a son and a female partner as we shared family photos, they were taken aback, saying, ‘Oh, you have a son? Who’s the father?’” Wilson recalls.

On the buyer/seller side

On the customer side, Khoi Le, CRS, broker/owner with Hunter Chase Realty in Albuquerque and Santa Fe, New Mexico, recalls a seller who explicitly asked if the buyers were LGBTQ+ members after noticing the same-gender names on the purchase agreement. “Why would it matter?” ponders Le. “He wouldn’t blatantly say, ‘I won’t accept the offer because of this,’ but there was a level of bias with it.” The seller started leaning toward a different offer. Only after Le explained that the buyers were a father/son duo did he move forward with the transaction.

Wilson and Le note that discrimination often occurs in the subtext. “We don’t usually hear of a failed transaction. The customer may simply ‘move in another direction’ but may not say why,” points out Le. “If there’s discrimination, it’s very coded.”

Tips for fostering acceptance and increasing awareness

How can you foster acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community and increase awareness within your own business, your company and the real estate industry?

Get educated

While most people know it’s illegal to overtly discriminate, bias and discrimination can pop up in many nuanced ways. “Having a DEI program as a requirement is going to be a major step in moving forward,” notes Le. Do a deep dive into current market data about LGBTQ+ homeownership. Connect with real estate groups that focus on LGBTQ+ issues and provide a referral network of agents and allied partners. Equip yourself so you can be informed and educate others. (See sidebar for resources.) “Even though I’m part of the community, I need to keep abreast of issues, too,” says Le, noting he’s taken training on pronoun usage to adopt more inclusive language.

Model what you want to see

Wilson lives by the motto: you get what you focus on. “I want to be the example that I didn’t have so other LGBTQ+ families can look at me and think, ‘Oh, look at her, she’s flourishing in real estate, she looks like me and she’s an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community.’ The more we show up, the better it gets.” Wilson proudly shares she’s a member of Keller Williams Rainbow Network. “It supports other LGBTQ+ industry members and helps connect clients with REALTORS^® who understand what it’s like to walk in their shoes,” she explains. The group aims to serve its LGBTQ+ communities, clients and agents, and that includes “advocating for support, diversity and inclusion at every step.”

Be proactive

Le recalls two male buyers who stressed the importance of being represented correctly on the American Land Title Association (ALTA) settlement statement. “The sellers were noted as husband/wife but there was no option to highlight the buyers’ status,” explains Le, noting it sent the message that the buyers were not equal. “It was a big deal to them, as it should be,” Le says. “I represented them, so it became a big deal to me and my team.” Le took this cause to heart, not just on behalf of his clients. He’s now working to get all title companies on board on a national scale. “It might be insignificant to you, but it’s a big deal to others—they don’t have that voice, that platform, to make that change. It’s up to us (the real estate industry) to take that initiative,” he says.

Report discrimination

The National Association of REALTORS^® includes a section on discrimination in its Code of Ethics. If you see or hear of a situation where someone is being biased—whether it’s a buyer, seller, fellow agent or broker— you should report this discriminatory behavior to NAR and your state and local association, advises Wilson.

“As a REALTOR^®, you’re helping individuals, investors and families—that’s the main job. You’re trying to be relatable, be the expert who will take care of them, all while being authentic,” Wilson concludes. “Everyone has their struggles and you’re just the friendly guide in their stories, ensuring they know you’ve got their best interest at heart. You become their trusted REALTOR^® for life.”

Le adds, “Seeing RRC talk about this at all is a great sign. As a member of the LGBTQ+ community, I feel relief, I feel seen. And this should be what my clients feel, too.”

For more advocacy-related issues and resources visit NAR.realtor/advocacy.

Photo: iStock.com/arsenisspyros